Friday, July 31, 2020

B&N FREE FRIDAY

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https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/a-dead-man-and-doggie-delights-aleksa-baxter/1129935070?ean=2940161208991&fbclid=IwAR3Qp_hvHeovOLYheWX_hqcApmo6UlrCQwRWSYerEqCZzgXklUy_DrV2G9Y

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Jokes and stuff

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Why aren't there any knock knock jokes about America?

Because freedom rings.

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Knock Knock
Who's there?
Handsome
Handsome who?
Handsome one the key so they can open the door!

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“Houseework is not an option. My bed is sending out serious nap rays. I can't help myself. The fluffy pillows and warm comforter are more powerful than I am. I have no choice but to snuggle under the covers.”

― Laurie Halse Anderson

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Knock, knock.
Who's there?
 A little old lady.
A little old lady who?
I didn't know you could yodel.

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“It's tough to make predictions, especially about the future.”

― Yogi Berra

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“Things to do today:

1) Breathe in.

2) Breathe out.”

― Ned Vizzini

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Knock knock.
Who's there?
Canoe
Canoe who?
Canoe help me with this door?

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Knock-knock.
Who's there?
Peas.
Peas who?
Peas open the door and let me in.

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“How is it possible to have a civil war?”

― George Carlin

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“What an astonishing thing a book is. It's a flat object made from a tree with flexible parts on which are imprinted lots of funny dark squiggles. But one glance at it and you're inside the mind of another person, maybe somebody dead for thousands of years. Across the millennia, an author is speaking clearly and silently inside your head, directly to you. Writing is perhaps the greatest of human inventions, binding together people who never knew each other, citizens of distant epochs. Books break the shackles of time. A book is proof that humans are capable of working magic."

[Cosmos, Part 11: The Persistence of Memory (1980)]”

― Carl Sagan, Cosmos

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Question: What happened when Santa got a parking ticket on his sleigh?

Answer: He got Mistle-towed!

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“I know it is wet and the sun is not sunny, but we can have lots of good fun that is funny.”

― Dr. Seuss, The Cat in the Hat

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Question: What is the fear of Santa Claus called?

Answer: Claus-trophobia!

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Question: What do snowmen eat for breakfast?

Answer: Snowflakes!

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Question: What kind of candle burns longer , a red candle or a green candle?

Neither, candles burn shorter.

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Question: How much did Santa pay for his sleigh?

Answer: Nothing, it was on the house!

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A successful diet is the triumph of mind over platter.

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"I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind. Some come from ahead and some come from behind. But I've bought a big bat. I'm all ready you see. Now my troubles are going to have troubles with me!"

— Dr. Seuss

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“Love does not consist of gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction.”

― Antoine de Saint-ExupĂ©ry, Airman's Odyssey

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"Live in the present, remember the past, and fear not the future, for it doesn't exist and never shall. There is only now."

— Christopher Paolini

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What did the snake say when the teacher asked him a question?

Don't asp me!

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What’s the name for a group of lions taking it in turns to use a copy machine?
Copy cats!

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Fly me to the moon ..

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Kindle

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Black Magic Kitten (Familiar Kitten Mysteries Book 1)

https://www.amazon.com/Black-Magic-Kitten-Familiar-Mysteries-ebook/dp/B0842XJ2BD/ref=tmm_kin_title_sr?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=

Symbol & Stone (Mysteries of the Guild Book 1)

https://www.amazon.com/Symbol-Stone-Mysteries-Guild-Book-ebook-dp-B01C4MEU5C/dp/B01C4MEU5C/ref=mt_other?_encoding=UTF8&me=&qid=

Three of Pentacles (Moira Chase Book 3)

https://www.amazon.com/Three-Pentacles-Moira-Chase-Book-ebook/dp/B07YMPBK98/ref=tmm_kin_title_sr?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=

Noodles

https://www.amazon.com/Ramen-Noodle-Recipes-Prepare-Minutes-ebook/dp/B00YPAW324/ref=tmm_kin_title_sr?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=

Guitar

https://www.amazon.com/Guitar-Encyclopedia-Brian-Tarquin-ebook/dp/B00MSYV3VQ/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_67?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=MZ6CZA5ADYJWRJGJD3AK

Destination

https://www.amazon.com/Destination-Journey-Parkinsons-Rajeev-Gupta-ebook/dp/B087G6RHP8/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_98?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=MZ6CZA5ADYJWRJGJD3AK

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Free Nook Books

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This is a constantly updating list of free Nook Books. The categories are on the left side of the page.



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Nook Audio

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https://www.nookaudiobooks.com/audiobook/115917/joy-of-less-the

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Thursday, July 30, 2020

Kindle

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Cats

https://www.amazon.com/Fascinating-Facts-Didnt-Know-About-ebook/dp/B07R5LG3G5/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_14?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=VFG8G7S4RXJPYGH7FJ4N

Scotch Irish

https://www.amazon.com/Scotch-Irish-History-Legacy-Ethnic-America-ebook/dp/B08DPZD9FX/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_25?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=VFG8G7S4RXJPYGH7FJ4N

Raccoon Dog

https://www.amazon.com/Facts-About-Raccoon-Picture-Book-ebook/dp/B01LWDEFMA/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_32?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=VFG8G7S4RXJPYGH7FJ4N

Marne

https://www.amazon.com/Marne-History-Legacy-Battles-Fought-ebook/dp/B08DQ11T9W/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_36?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=VFG8G7S4RXJPYGH7FJ4N

Italy

https://www.amazon.com/Condottieri-History-Italys-Mercenaries-Renaissance-ebook/dp/B08DPV9HF4/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_37?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=VFG8G7S4RXJPYGH7FJ4N

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Jokes and stuff

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Question: What do you get when you cross a flying saucer with Santa Claus?

Answer: A UF Ho, Ho, Ho!

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Question: What did the grape say to the peanut butter?

Answer: “Tis the season to be jelly!”

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Knock Knock!
Who’s there?
Tree.
Tree who?
Tree Wise Men!

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Question: Why does Santa have a garden?

Answer: So he can hoe, hoe, hoe!

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Question: What did the Gingerbread Man put on his bed?

Answer: A cookie sheet!

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Question: Which reindeer has bad manners?

Answer: Rude-olph!

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Question: How do snowmen greet each other?

Answer: “Ice to meet you!”

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Question: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a polar bear?

Answer: A brrr-grrr.

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Question: Where do sheep buy their Christmas presents?

Answer: At Wool-Mart!

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A boy was bagging groceries at a supermarket. One day the store installed a machine for squeezing fresh orange juice. Intrigued, the young man asked if he could be allowed to work the machine, but his request was denied. Said the store manager, "Sorry, kid, but baggers can't be juicers."

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Why was the alligator coughing?

It had a frog in its throat!

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Why do bears have fur coats?

Because they tried hoodies and they looked silly.

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"What sunshine is to flowers, smiles are to humanity. These are but trifles, to
be sure; but scattered along life's pathway, the good they do is inconceivable."

~ Joseph Addison ~

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**Getting older has some fun moments**

My goal for 2016 was to lose just 10 pounds ... only 15 to go.

Ate salad for dinner ... Mostly just croutons & tomatoes ... Actually just
one big, round crouton covered with tomato sauce ... And cheese ...

FINE, OK ! it was a pizza ... I ate a pizza ...There happy?

I just did a week's worth of cardio, after walking into a spider web ...

I don't mean to brag but ... I finished my 14-day diet food in just 3
hours and 20 minutes ...

A recent study has found women who carry a little extra weight live
longer than men who mention it ...

Remember back when we were kids and every time it snowed
they closed school? Yeah, Me neither.

I may not be that funny or athletic or good looking or smart or talented
... Dad gummit! I forgot where I was going with this ..
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"Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed."

-- Charles Schulz

A pessimist is one who makes difficulties of his opportunities, and an
optimist is one who makes opportunities of his difficulties.

~ Harry Truman

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Some 15,000 books have been written about Lincoln — more books than have been written about any other person in world history, with the exception of Jesus Christ.

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Kindle

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The Education of Henry Adams

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07VGCSQXS/ref=docs-os-doi_0

Custer

https://www.amazon.com/Warface-Weird-Custer-William-Sumrall-ebook/dp/B01D5HMM8M/ref=tmm_kin_title_sr?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=

Breakfast

https://www.amazon.com/Breakfast-Recipes-Delicious-Healthy-Friends-ebook/dp/B00UDE31HW/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_22?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=H216Q1PW29HADBGJDWW5

Heroes

https://www.amazon.com/Great-Book-American-Heroes-History-ebook/dp/B08DQW3W87/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_95?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=W93VZJPGSEXYMESE66Q1
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Nook Audio

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https://www.nookaudiobooks.com/audiobook/296381/roll-with-it

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Wednesday, July 29, 2020

Jokes and stuff

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What did the dog get when it swallowed the watch?

Ticks!

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A french fry walks into a bar.

"Sorry," says the bartender, "we don't serve food here."

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“We have enough youth—how about a fountain of smart?”

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“I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.”

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What kind of car does Mickey Mouse's wife drive?

A mini-van.

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Question: Why did Santa run around his bed on Christmas morning?

Answer: To catch up on his sleep!

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Question: Why did the snowman name his dog Frost?

Answer: Because Frost bites!

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Question: Where do the three wise men get their robes tailored?

Answer: Bethle-HEM!

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Question: Why is Santa so good at karate?

Answer: Because he has a black belt!

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Question: What do you get when you cross a peanut with a duck?

Answer: A nut quacker.

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Question: What do you call Santa’s helpers?

Answer: Subordinate Clauses.

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Question: What did the spider want for Christmas?

Answer: A web-site!

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Question: Why did the thermometer break?

Answer: The temperature dropped!

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Question: What does Santa Claus plant in his garden?

Answer: Christmas bulbs!

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Question: Where do sheep buy their Christmas presents?

Answer: At Wool-Mart!

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Question: Why was the computer quiet on Christmas Eve?

Answer: Because, not a creature was stirring… not even a mouse!

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“What you call your personality, you know? --it's not like actual bones, or teeth, something solid. It's more like a flame. A flame can be upright, and a flame can flicker in the wind, a flame can be extinguished so there's no sign of it, like it had never been. ”

― Joyce Carol Oates, I Am No One You Know

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“Be what you would seem to be - or, if you'd like it put more simply - never imagine yourself not to be otherwise than what it might appear to others that what you were or might have been was not otherwise than what you had been would have appeared to them to be otherwise.”

― Lewis Carroll

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“What an astonishing thing a book is. It's a flat object made from a tree with flexible parts on which are imprinted lots of funny dark squiggles. But one glance at it and you're inside the mind of another person, maybe somebody dead for thousands of years. Across the millennia, an author is speaking clearly and silently inside your head, directly to you. Writing is perhaps the greatest of human inventions, binding together people who never knew each other, citizens of distant epochs. Books break the shackles of time. A book is proof that humans are capable of working magic."

[Cosmos, Part 11: The Persistence of Memory (1980)]”

― Carl Sagan, Cosmos

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Kindle

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Infinite Universe Theory: Glenn Borchardt

https://www.amazon.com/Infinite-Universe-Theory-Glenn-Borchardt-ebook/dp/B076X85XVN/ref=tmm_kin_title_sr?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=

The Beauty of Horror: When the narcissists mask falls off

https://www.amazon.com/Beauty-Horror-When-narcissists-falls-ebook/dp/B084T7Q6GF/ref=tmm_kin_title_sr?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=

Do It Yourself Face Mask Hand Sanitizer and Wipes

https://www.amazon.com/Yourself-Face-Mask-Sanitizer-Wipes-ebook/dp/B08BKKBC94/ref=tmm_kin_title_sr?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=

The Big Book of Business Quotations

https://www.amazon.com/Big-Book-Business-Quotations-Smartest-ebook/dp/B01HDVCTP2/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_10?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=WPKY2GRT4DAR2980B5JY

Bighorn

https://www.amazon.com/Little-Bighorn-John-Hough-Jr-ebook/dp/B00J75IQY6/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_43?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=WPKY2GRT4DAR2980B5JY

Chapin

https://www.amazon.com/Harry-Chapin-Story-Peter-Morton-ebook/dp/B07MTCZBHN/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_57?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=S3M9Y88A4BJDXH53228J

Saint

https://www.amazon.com/Saint-Faustina-Kowalska-Life-Inspired-ebook/dp/B08DCJ9PH5/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_58?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=S3M9Y88A4BJDXH53228J
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Nook Audio

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https://www.nookaudiobooks.com/audiobook/05497/track-of-the-cat-the

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Tuesday, July 28, 2020

My motto too ....

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Jokes and stuff

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“Our separation from each other is an optical illusion.”

― Albert Einstein

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“To punish me for my contempt for authority, fate made me an authority myself.”

― Albert Einstein

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“You do not really understand something unless you can explain it to your grandmother.”

― Albert Einstein

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“Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use. ”

― Wendell Johnson

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“You wouldn't have won if we'd beaten you.”

― Yogi Berra

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Question: What’s red and white and goes around and around?

Answer: Santa Claus stuck in a revolving door!

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Question: How many presents can Santa fit into an empty sack?

Answer: One, after that it’s not empty!

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Why should bowling alleys be quiet?

So you can hear a pin drop!

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Shakespearean Insult of the day ..

“[Thou] mad mustachio purple-hued maltworms!”

― William Shakespeare, Henry IV: Part 1

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What did the baseball glove say to the baseball?

“Catch you later”

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Why can’t you tell a joke while ice skating?

Because the ice might crack up!

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Old white water rafters never die, they just get disgorged.

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What do you get if you cross a pig, a snake and a builder?

A boar constructor!

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Why are wolves like cards?

You’ll always find them in packs!

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"There is nothing so bad that politics can't make it worse."

Thomas Sowell

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Nook Audio

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https://www.nookaudiobooks.com/audiobook/227398/hunt-for-red-october-the

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Kindle

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Fences

https://www.amazon.com/Fences-Gates-Bridges-Make-Them-ebook/dp/B004PGMHI8/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_37?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=HMGQPS7E68353ZQXAMKW

The Chronicles of the Wuhan Virus: Deeper insights into the pandemic that shook the world in 2020

https://www.amazon.com/Chronicles-Wuhan-Virus-insights-pandemic-ebook/dp/B08CVS1MJG/ref=tmm_kin_title_sr?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=

Cats

https://www.amazon.com/Cats-Miscellany-Everything-Always-Friends-ebook/dp/B0067MZGFE/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_79?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=YYZ97Z877C12PKSABQYZ

Crafts

https://www.amazon.com/Mason-Jar-Crafts-Kids-Projects-ebook/dp/B00VIH20NE/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_100?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=YYZ97Z877C12PKSABQYZ

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Monday, July 27, 2020

Kindle

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A Lady's Life in the Rocky Mountains

https://www.amazon.com/Ladys-Life-Rocky-Mountains-ebook/dp/B08DL5PZPC/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_15?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=17DR74QMKFN729JDTTBH

Jews who Rescued Jews During the Holocaust (100 Stories of Jewish Rescue Book 1)

https://www.amazon.com/Rescued-During-Holocaust-Stories-Jewish-ebook/dp/B08BYX7SHZ/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_28?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=17DR74QMKFN729JDTTBH

Cassia

https://www.amazon.com/Cassia-Women-American-Revolution-Book-ebook/dp/B012Q8WS80/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_63?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=0M34H7RPBY07K94TTDYY

Kimpo

https://www.amazon.com/Kimpa-Vita-Influential-Christian-Prophet-ebook/dp/B08DK8QTFQ/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_67?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=0M34H7RPBY07K94TTDYY

Baseball

https://www.amazon.com/Having-Career-Day-Incredible-Baseball-ebook/dp/B00J75IRCM/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_99?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=0M34H7RPBY07K94TTDYY

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Jokes and stuff

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"He who fights monsters should see to it that in the process, he does not become a monster. And when you look into the abyss, the abyss also looks into you."

 - Nietzsche

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"I'm a greater believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it"

— Thomas Jefferson

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"Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness,
and self-control. To these I commit my day."

~ Max Lucado ~

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What do snakes write in valentine cards?

Love and hisses.

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What happens if you cross a bear with a skunk?

You get Winnie the Phew -heeey!

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I told my suitcases there will be no vacation this year, now I'm dealing with emotional baggage.

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“I like video games, but they're really violent. I'd like to play a video game where you help the people who were shot in all the other games. It'd be called 'Really Busy Hospital.”

― Demetri Martin

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Shakespearean Insult of the day ...

 From Lear: "A knave; a rascal; an eater of broken meats; a base, proud, shallow, beggarly, three-suited, hundred-pound, filthy, worsted-stocking knave; a lily-livered, action-taking knave, a whoreson, glass-gazing, super-serviceable finical rogue; one-trunk-inheriting slave; one that wouldst be a bawd, in way of good service, and art nothing but the composition of a knave, beggar, coward, pandar, and the son and heir of a mongrel bitch: one whom I will beat into clamorous whining, if thou deniest the least syllable of thy addition."

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When does a baseball player wear armor?

At the knight games!

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“Never lie in bed at night asking yourself questions you can't answer.”

― Charles M. Schulz

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Have you heard the latest statistic joke yet?

Probably ...

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What is E.T. short for?

So he can fit in his little spaceship.

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What does a camel use to become invisible?

Camel-flage!

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How do turtles talk to each other?

They use shell phones.

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“And certainly, the mistakes that we male and female mortals make when we have our own way might fairly raise some wonder that we are so fond of it.”

― George Eliot, Middlemarch

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What is a bird’s favorite cookie?

Chocolate chirp

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Why do leopards have a hard time hiding?

Because they are always spotted!

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What has wheels and a trunk but no engine?

An elephant on roller skates!
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An early test ...

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Nook Audio

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https://www.nookaudiobooks.com/audiobook/237602/the-unwanteds-quests-dragon-ghosts

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Sunday, July 26, 2020

Kindle

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Deadly Trespass: A Mystery In Maine

https://www.amazon.com/Deadly-Trespass-Mystery-Sandra-Neily-ebook/dp/B06XK5CBCG/ref=tmm_kin_title_sr?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=

Missing

https://www.amazon.com/Missing-Alive-Gripping-Psychological-Suspense-ebook/dp/B00W1Y8XYS/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_30?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=F56DTHXDXQKNFJFP31R4

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Hello, is it me you're looking for?


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Jokes and stuff

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(^_^) - Pay Attention To These Signs - You Might Be Getting Older

You are 17 around the neck, 42 around the waist, 96 around the golf course.

You are proud of your lawn mower.

You begin every other sentence with, 'Nowadays...'

Your back goes out more than you do.

You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.

Your best friend is dating someone half their age, and isn't breaking any laws.

Your arms are almost too short to read the newspaper.

You sing along with the elevator music.

You enjoy hearing about other people's operations.

You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

People call at 9:00 p.m. and ask, 'Did I wake you?'

You send money to PBS.

The end of your tie doesn't come anywhere near the top of your pants.

You know what the word 'equity' means.

You can't remember the last time you laid on the floor to watch television.

You talk about 'good grass' and you're referring to someone's lawn.

You get into a heated argument about pension plans.

You got cable for The Weather Channel.

You can go bowling without drinking.

You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it.

Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.

Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.

An 'all nighter' means not getting up to use the bathroom.

You're not sure if these are facts or jokes.

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Why are leopards so bad at hide and seek?

They are always spotted!

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How do you begin a bear race?

Ready, teddy, go!

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What do you call a train loaded with toffee?

A chew chew train.

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"If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to treat everything as if it were a nail."

 -Abraham Maslow

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“For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness.”

― Emerson

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Unsolicited advice is usually unwelcome.

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"Peace begins with a smile.."

— Mother Teresa

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"Happiness is not the absence of problems, it's the ability to deal with them."

— Steve Maraboli

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“Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results.”

― Narcotics Anonymous

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Where does Dracula water ski?

Lake Erie.

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Promise Yourself

To be so strong that nothing
can disturb your peace of mind.

To talk health, happiness, and prosperity
to every person you meet.

To make all your friends feel
that there is something in them

To look at the sunny side of everything
and make your optimism come true.

To think only the best, to work only for the best,
and to expect only the best.

To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others
as you are about your own.

To forget the mistakes of the past
and press on to the greater achievements of the future.

To wear a cheerful countenance at all times
and give every living creature you meet a smile.

To give so much time to the improvement of yourself
that you have no time to criticize others.

To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear,
and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.

To think well of yourself and to proclaim this fact to the world,
not in loud words but great deeds.

To live in faith that the whole world is on your side
so long as you are true to the best that is in you.”

― C.. Larson, Your Forces and How to Use Them

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"Be a rainbow in someone else's cloud."

— Maya Angelou
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Nook Audio

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https://www.nookaudiobooks.com/audiobook/38426/clockwork-angels

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Kindle

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The History of Antiquity (Vol. 1-6)

https://www.amazon.com/History-Antiquity-Vol-1-6-Phoenicia-ebook/dp/B08D961ZM1/ref=zg_bs_156576011_f_42?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=QVT24HG87J0G3DA3P6Y5

Moon

https://www.amazon.com/Moon-Missions-Before-Apollo-Surveyor-ebook/dp/B08DKQPCDL/ref=zg_bs_156576011_f_47?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=QVT24HG87J0G3DA3P6Y5

Gun

https://www.amazon.com/Gun-Its-Development-W-Greener-ebook/dp/B01LR7TOLA/ref=zg_bs_156576011_f_49?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=QVT24HG87J0G3DA3P6Y5

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Saturday, July 25, 2020

Jokes and stuff

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“Dance. Smile. Giggle. Marvel. TRUST. HOPE. LOVE. WISH. BELIEVE. Most of all, enjoy every moment of the journey, and appreciate where you are at this moment instead of always focusing on how far you have to go.”

― Mandy Hale

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As you slide down the banister of life, may the splinters never point in the wrong direction.

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Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.

- Dalai Lama

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Lily Munster: "There's an ancient Transylvanian proverb we used to have in the old country: always put the shortest chain on the oldest wolf."

- The Munsters (1964)

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"When more and more people are thrown out of work, unemployment results."

-- Former U.S. President Calvin Coolidge

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"I cannot remember the books I've read any more than the meals I have eaten; even so, they have made me."

— Ralph Waldo Emerson

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111, 111, 111 x 111, 111, 111 = 12, 345, 678, 987, 654, 321

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There is no key to happiness; the door is always open.

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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.

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My furniture store keeps sending me emails trying to get me to come back, but all I wanted was one night stand.

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What is black, white, red and spotty?

A skunk with chicken pox!

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How come snakes always know what they weigh?

They have their own scales!

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Nook Audio

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https://www.nookaudiobooks.com/audiobook/80820/short-and-tragic-life-of-robert-peace-the

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Kindle

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The Dying Light (Sister Agnes Series Book 1)

https://www.amazon.com/Dying-Light-Alison-Joseph-ebook/dp/B07B64RLDP/ref=tmm_kin_title_sr?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=

Extreme Bricks: Spectacular, Record-Breaking, and Astounding LEGO Projects from around the World

https://www.amazon.com/Extreme-Bricks-Spectacular-Record-Breaking-Astounding-ebook/dp/B00E2585ZG/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=

Greek

https://www.amazon.com/Gift-Greek-Authentic-Recipes-Mediterranean-ebook/dp/B06XQDRF7B/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_12?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=S5QE4YFR079BQGA38XKR

Food Style

https://www.amazon.com/Food-Stylists-Handbook-Hundreds-Bloggers-ebook/dp/B071VLYKV1/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=

Spies

https://www.amazon.com/GOD-SPIES-BASED-SECRET-OPERATION-ebook/dp/B07TCSLFWR/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_92?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=DEQT3CMD6M7QV5AC9HA1

Treason

https://www.amazon.com/Treason-America-Disloyalty-Dissent-History-ebook/dp/B01FCLLL9K/ref=zg_bs_157325011_f_99?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=DEQT3CMD6M7QV5AC9HA1

Crafts

https://www.amazon.com/Crafts-Skills-Native-Americans-Moccasins-ebook/dp/B00KO9F0OS/ref=zg_bs_156576011_f_5?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=ZGK69F1BD29M07K8X2BA

History of the American Abolitionism

https://www.amazon.com/History-American-Abolitionism-Narratives-Compromise-ebook/dp/B07BMV69G5/ref=zg_bs_156576011_f_34?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=ZGK69F1BD29M07K8X2BA

Old West

https://www.amazon.com/Guns-Old-West-Illustrated-Reference-ebook/dp/B01LR7TOO2/ref=zg_bs_156576011_f_38?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=ZGK69F1BD29M07K8X2BA
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Friday, July 24, 2020

B&N FREE FRIDAY

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https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/moribund-genevieve-iseult-eldredge/1125509597?ean=9781945723087&fbclid=IwAR0NjgiOoaWjj9KKfxLmCydPAcTvurmMp6fMB47NODcO8gbFxHBKaIsX1YY

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Jokes

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Nylons give women a run for their money.

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Old chemists never die, they just fail to react.

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Hand over the calculator, friends don’t let friends derive drunk.

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“I was in the supermarket the other day, and I met a lady in the aisle where they keep the generic brands. Her name was 'woman.”

― Steven Wright

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"These are not wrinkles. These are survival lines of my life. Each one holds
a story, a laugh or a memory. They are like snowflakes. No two are alike."

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Why are baby snakes always so happy?

They come with their own rattle!

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What did the rats play at recess?

Hide and squeak!

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Free Nook Books

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This is a constantly updating list of free Nook Books. The categories are on the left side of the page.



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