Sunday, July 12, 2020

Jokes and stuff

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“Never memorize something that you can look up.”

― Albert Einstein

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“The fact that we live at the bottom of a deep gravity well, on the surface of a gas covered planet going around a nuclear fireball 90 million miles away and think this to be normal is obviously some indication of how skewed our perspective tends to be.”

― Douglas Adams, The Salmon of Doubt: Hitchhiking the Galaxy One Last Time

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“I suppose I'll have to add the force of gravity to my list of enemies.”

― Lemony Snicket

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“Begin at the beginning," the King said, very gravely, "and go on till you come to the end: then stop.

― Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

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What snake might you use when driving?

A windshield viper!

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Why was the leopard wearing a striped jumper?

So he wouldn't be spotted!

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(^_^) - Shingles

Bubba had shingles. Those of us who spend much time in a doctor's office should appreciate this!

Doesn't it seem more and more that physicians are running their practices like an assembly line?

Here's what happened to Bubba:

Bubba walked into a doctor's office and the receptionist asked him what he had. Bubba said: 'Shingles.' So she wrote down his name, address, medical insurance number and told him to have a seat.

Fifteen minutes later a nurse's aide came out and asked Bubba what he had.

Bubba said, 'Shingles' So she wrote down his height, weight, a complete medical history and told Bubba to wait in the examining room.

A half hour later a nurse came in and asked Bubba what he had. Bubba said, 'Shingles...' So the nurse gave Bubba a blood test, a blood pressure test, an electrocardiogram, and told Bubba to take off all his clothes and wait for the doctor.

An hour later the doctor came in and found Bubba sitting patiently in the nude and asked Bubba what he had.

Bubba said, 'Shingles.'

The doctor asked, 'Where?'

Bubba said, 'Outside on the truck. Where do you want me to unload 'em??'


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