Thursday, December 24, 2020

Jokes and stuff

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Teacher: Who can include the word ‘politics’ in a sentence? 

Pupil: After the parrot ate my watch Polly-tics!

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Why do monkeys climb trees? 

The elevators are always broken! 

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Why do poor canaries learn to talk just as quick as rich ones? 

Because talk is cheep! 

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Why do seagulls fly over the sea? 

Because if they flew over the bay they would be called bagels! 

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Why do sheep never leave the field? 

They all stand at the gate saying, “After ewe!”

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Question: What’s red and white and goes around and around? 

Answer: Santa Claus stuck in a revolving door!

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Question: How many presents can Santa fit into an empty sack? 

Answer: One, after that it’s not empty!

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Question: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? 

Answer: Frostbite!

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Knock Knock! 

Who’s there? 

Mary and Abbey. 

Mary and Abbey who? 

Mary Christmas and Abbey New Year!

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Night, the beloved.  Night, when words fade and things come alive.  When the destructive analysis of day is done, and all that is truly important becomes whole and sound again.  When we reassemble our fragmentary self and grow with the calm of a tree. 

 ~Antoine de Saint-Exupéry



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