NASTY HABIT

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NASTY HABIT

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I speak English, the language I was taught as a child

It is a habit so deeply ingrained that I think in English words

It is not a habit I wish to change, although I could

But so far English is fine

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I have emotional responses I don't like

For example panic

It is a habit for me to feel panic when the smallest thing goes wrong

I immediately feel the effects; racing thoughts, upset tummy, pounding heart

This is an emotional habit, learned from childhood

Where the slightest misstep caused dire consequences

Where I was under constant scrutiny and criticism

So, I lived in a perpetual state of fear and dread

But this is not my normal state of emotion

I have worked to create a life of calm and peace

My panic was learned as a child, developed as a habit

This is a habit I am working to break, I want to remain calm

Use my ability to reason, to talk myself down from

This very miserable and nasty habit

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