Jokes of the day

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What did the frog say when he heard "Time flies when you are having fun?"

The frog said "Time is fun when you’re having flies!"

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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It didn't say anything, it just gave out a little wine!

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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut!

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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.

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Why was all the fruit in love with the banana?

Because it was appealing.

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What do you get when you cross a lemon and a cat?

A sour puss

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"I received the fundamentals of my education in school, but that was not enough. My real education, the superstructure, the details, the true architecture, I got out of the public library. 

For an impoverished child whose family could not afford to buy books, the library was the open door to wonder and achievement, and I can never be sufficiently grateful that I had the wit to charge through that door and make the most of it. Now, when I read constantly about the way in which library funds are being cut and cut, I can only think that the door is closing and that American society has found one more way to destroy itself." 

— Isaac Asimov (I. Asimov: A Memoir)

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