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While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old.
Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, "Are you a cop?"
"Yes," I answered and continued writing the report.
'My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is that right?'
'Yes, that's right,' I told her.
'Well, then,' she said as she extended her foot toward me,'would you please tie my shoe?'
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Why can't you hear a Pterodactyl in the bathroom?
Because the P is silent!
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“The most beautiful experience we can have is the mysterious. It is the fundamental emotion that stands at the cradle of true art and true science.”
― Albert Einstein, The World As I See It
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“I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.”
― Albert Einstein
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“The world as we have created it is a process of our thinking. It cannot be changed without changing our thinking.”
― Albert Einstein
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I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and then it dawned on me.
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“What's another word for thesaurus?”
― Steven Wright
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At the supermarket I saw a man and a woman wrapped in a barcode. I asked, "Are you two an item?"
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What do you call a magician with wings?
A flying sorcerer.
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