Jokes and stuff

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“Thy loving smile will surely hail

The love-gift of a fairy tale.”

― Lewis Carroll, Through the Looking-Glass and What Alice Found There

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(😊) - Who Is Norma?

A sweet grandmother telephones St. Joseph `s Hospital.

She timidly asked, "Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is doing?"

The operator said, "I'll be glad to help, dear. What's the name and room number of the patient?"

The grandmother in her weak, tremulous voice said, "Norma Findlay, Room 302."

The operator replied, "Let me put you on hold while I check with the nurse's station for that room."

After a few minutes, the operator returned to the phone and said, "I have good news. Her nurse just told me that Norma is doing well. Her blood pressure is fine; her blood work just came back normal and her physician, Dr. Cohen, has scheduled her to be discharged tomorrow."

The grandmother said, "Thank you.That's wonderful. I was so worried. Thank you so much for the good news."

The operator replied, "You're more than welcome.

Is Norma your daughter?"

The grandmother said, "No, I'm Norma Findlay in Room 302.

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“Do you know the difference between education and experience? Education is when you read the fine print; experience is what you get when you don't. ” 

― Pete Seeger

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“The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity.” 

― George Carlin

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If you have three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three oranges in the other hand, what do you have? 

Very big hands.

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Where do you find chili beans?

At the North Pole.

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What's a three-season bed? One without a spring.

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Reading while sunbathing makes you, well, red.

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A person's home is their castle, in a manor of speaking.

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