Humor of the day

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THINGS WE WOULD NOT KNOW WITHOUT THE MOVIES:

--It is always possible to park directly outside any building you are visiting.

--A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.

--Police departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.

--If you start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.

--Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communication systems of any invading alien civilization.

--An electric fence, powerful enough to kill a dinosaur will cause no lasting damage to an eight year old child.

--It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts, your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.

--When a person is knocked unconscious by a blow to the head, they will never suffer a concussion or brain damage.

--No one involved in a car chase, hijacking, explosion, volcanic eruption or alien invasion will ever go into shock.

--When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.

--Any lock can be picked by a credit card or paper clip in seconds, unless it's the door to a burning building with a child trapped inside.

--Television news bulletins usually contain a story that affects you personally at that precise moment you turn the television on.

-- After a violent and prolonged fist fight, the hero will only have a tiny bit of blood at the corner of his mouth.

-- Getting shot causes the person to fly backwards, often through a large window.

-- If there is a huge fish tank in the scene that thing is going to be broken and all the water and fish flood out onto the floor.

In crime re-enactment shows, all the victims are dead on a throw rug.


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