Wisdom that Comes With Age ....

.
.
.
Wisdom that Comes With Age



I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. People move out of the way much faster now!

You can tell a lot about a woman's mood just by her hands. If she is holding a gun, she's probably angry.

You know that tingly little feeling you get when you really like someone? That's common sense leaving your body.

I don't like making plans for the day because then the word "premeditated" gets thrown around in the courtroom.

I didn't make it to the gym today. That makes five years in a row.

I decided to change calling the bathroom the John and renamed it the Jim. I feel so much better saying I went to the Jim this morning.

Last year I joined a support group for procrastinators. We haven't met yet...

Old age is coming at a really bad time!

When I was a child I thought Nap Time was a punishment... now, as a grownup, it just feels like a small vacation!

The biggest lie I tell myself is...."I don't need to write that down, I'll remember it".

I don't have gray hair. I have "wisdom highlights". I'm just very wise.

Of course I talk to myself, sometimes I need expert advice.

"It is easier to fool people than it is to convince them they have been fooled." - Mark Twain
.
.
.