Friday, March 5, 2021

Jokes and stuff

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Knock knock! 

Who’s there? 

Somebody too short to ring the doorbell.

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Knock Knock! 

Who’s there? 

Alex! 

Alex who? 

Alex the questions round here!

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One minute you're staying up all night partying with your friends, then, in the blink of an eye, you're drinking water and taking it easy because you pulled a muscle putting on your socks.

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Why did the banana go to the doctor?

It was not peeling well.

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Knock Knock

Who's there?

Dishes.

Dishes Who?

You no know me? Dishes your friend!

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Knock Knock

Who's there?

Meow

Meow who?

Take meow to the ball game.

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Paddy was driving down the street in a sweat because he had an important meeting and couldn't find a parking place. 

Looking up to heaven he said, "Lord take pity on me. If you find me a parking place I will go to Mass every Sunday for the rest of me life and give up me Irish Whiskey!"

Miraculously, a parking place appeared.

Paddy looked up again and said, "Never mind, I found one."

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What did Cinderella say when her photos did not show up? 

Someday my prints will come.

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What did the stamp say to the envelope? 

Stick with me and we will go places.

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